Deodorizing

[baloonon]

My family hates the smell of brewing. Any advice on neutralizing it?

During warmer weather I usually stick fans in the windows to get a good
cross breeze and that works, but that's obviously a no-go during the
winter.

Covering the smell with febreeze or frying bacon doesn't seem to be enough.
I've read that putting out a bowl of vinegar is supposed to negate the
smell, and maybe that works for a small space like a closet, but I can't
see how that would help for a whole house.

Any thoughts? I want to avoid being forced to boil outside in the snow.

[Bart Goddard]

Post by baloonon
My family hates the smell of brewing. Any advice
on neutralizing it?

If you have any sons, I have some bad news for you.

I eventually moved outside because my 3-gallon boils
were peeling the wallpaper and I wanted to go all-grain
and do 10-gallon boils. In Texas, I don't have to
worry about snow or cold so much (but it takes some
stamina to cook up a batch in 100-degree heat. And
a lot of Gatorade.)

Back to your question: Spankings all 'round should
neutralize the bitching. Try the phrase, "Let's see
if the smoke coming off your ass will mask
the smell enough for you" while you're blistering
bottoms.

Or did you mean neutralize the _aroma_? You're in a
tough spot. Now that they're sensitized to it, one
part of beer molecules detected in a trillion will
set them off. "I still smell it." Ideas:

Run the stove vent the whole time.

Start smoking cigars in the house. People need
perspective.

Vanilla extract heated in a pan is supposed to be
pleasant, in an cat-lady kind of way.

Introduce the kids to snuff and throw some diamonds
at the little woman.

Feed everyone a good dose of cayenne just before
brewing. By the time they get their sense of smell
and taste back, you should be done.

You can try logic, but only as a last resort: "Look,
I've reduced the aroma to 1/100 of what it was. I
think I've met you way more than half-way. I put
up with all your bad smells: Diapers, sweaty kids,
wife who pretends she never farts, mother-in-law's
Gahg ze Maggot Parfum etc. So I think
you can stand the smell of my cooking once in a while."
It might help, at this point, if you absentmindedly
start toying with your belt buckle.

Meh, go ahead and move outside. Start fixing up
a little area that's "yours". Get a fire pit, buy
some split and seasoned oak (because it burns really
hot), lounge chair, side table, pellet gun for the
grackles, patio umbrella to shade the hops from direct
sunlight. Then sit back and watch your brewing become
a kid magnet, because now it's "forbidden" and somehow
the smell doesn't bother them anymore.

S'all I got.

[T.J. Higgins]

Post by baloonon
My family hates the smell of brewing. Any advice on neutralizing it?

Moving it outside is the only real solution. Garage or utility
room also works.

Funny story: after my divorce some years ago I lived with my
brother for a bit. He & his girlfriend headed out of town for
the weekend. I informed them I'd be brewing while they were
gone. I brewed Saturday morning. Sunday evening when they
returned, when she walked into the house she started gagging &
retching like nothing I'd ever seen! Nearly 36 hours later the
aroma of boiled wort affected her that much. I was then informed
that I wasn't allowed to brew indoors at his house anymore.

[Ecnerwal]

Post by baloonon
My family hates the smell of brewing. Any advice on neutralizing it?
During warmer weather I usually stick fans in the windows to get a good
cross breeze and that works, but that's obviously a no-go during the
winter.
Covering the smell with febreeze or frying bacon doesn't seem to be enough.
I've read that putting out a bowl of vinegar is supposed to negate the
smell, and maybe that works for a small space like a closet, but I can't
see how that would help for a whole house.
Any thoughts? I want to avoid being forced to boil outside in the snow.

Dunno - I do 7-8 gallons in a 40 quart pot on a canning element on the
electric stove, with the vent hood fan running. No problems with peeling
walls, but it's evident that beer has been brewed - of course my
fermenters live in a closet nearby so that perpetuates the smells for a
while - but nobody here minds much.

Not being a fan of outside boiling has lead me to this point, and it
works for me. If I were in your shoes I'd be looking at what my options
were for an outbuilding, or possibly putting in a better vent fan over
the stove (or possibly start with a "real vent fan over the stove" if
you have one of those stupid ones that isn't a vent fan, so it just
blows in circles inside the house; Popular with cheapskate builders, but
not with cooks.)

Pretty sure I would _not_ be wafting Febreeze around while brewing - I
don't think I want that stuff in my wort. I also try to keep as much
distance as possible between vinegar and brewing - I'm not trying to
make 5 gallon batches of malt vinegar, so other than pre-cleaning copper
that will be well-rinsed and then boiled, no vinegar for me, please.

[Bob F]

Post by baloonon
My family hates the smell of brewing. Any advice on neutralizing it?
During warmer weather I usually stick fans in the windows to get a
good cross breeze and that works, but that's obviously a no-go during
the winter.
Covering the smell with febreeze or frying bacon doesn't seem to be
enough. I've read that putting out a bowl of vinegar is supposed to
negate the smell, and maybe that works for a small space like a
closet, but I can't see how that would help for a whole house.
Any thoughts? I want to avoid being forced to boil outside in the snow.

If your stove has a decent exhaust fan, you could tape or otherwise attach
plastic sheets ceiling to floor around the stove area with enough room to work.
The fan would draw air into the closed area from the house, and out the exhaust
to the outside, and almost all the odor should go with it.